Spring. A time of renewal, new growth, assurance of the promise of nature’s nourishment. The word that comes to me now is “gentle”. A time to be gentle with myself as the air and breezes are gentle on my cheek. This morning I will finish two paintings which just need a bit more work and then prepare a new canvas for a new beginning. Then on to the emerging new book. I know what I want to write about. I have already written two beginnings. Have pages of notes, outlines, interlinking thoughts and now wrestle with the process of transferring and transforming images to words, pared down to carry core themes and messages. I cook on this “stew” of information and begin to write, tasting as I go. Sampling this flavor and that as the beginning of this long process begins to unfold. The accountability to the readers of this blog will help me move forward.
I was very much looking forward to visiting my younger daughter and her family in Portland, ME last weekend. On the departure day, April 6, I drove the 1 1/4 hour trip to BWI in a blinding storm. White knuckle the whole trip. Thunder, lightning, sheets of rain. I thought perhaps I should turn around and cancel this trip. I did not. This was a huge storm system that blanketed the upper east coast, resulting in chaos at the airport. Flights delayed or cancelled affecting the whole of the country. After several hours of delays, my flight was also cancelled, because a transformer “blew” in Portland leaving the airport without power. I was close enough to drive back home. Others were not so fortunate. I was struck in all this by what I felt. Thousands of people were affected. The predominant energy was one of FEAR – Will I lose my place in line? Will I be able to get a flight out? How will I manage my three little boys? How will I get my debilitated father to some sort of lodging? Every single person in that terminal was STRESSED. The airline employees were doing the best they could but they were also stressed. Within all of this I saw that not one person had control of what was happing. Nature was in control. The skies raged and wept until they were finished. My older daughter said it was like RELEASE. The smile came with the sunshine a day later. We live with the illusion of control, but the only thing we really have control over is how WE choose to react to events that come our way. But this also connected me, in compassion, to all people in this world who are displaced by events of nature, war, famine, and man’s inhumanity to man. I felt, in that airline terminal, the fear, chaos and uncertainty of plans and lives turned on end. In that situation, within a week, all would be back to “normal”. But not so for those caught in the events named above. The question is: What can I do? What can we do? I cannot influence nations, or the complexities of an overpopulated planet facing the reality of diminishing resources. But I believe we are all connected by an invisible web and I can be in this web of humanity with love and compassion for those making difficult journeys.
I feel new about this blog but trust that pattern and frequency will emerge. South central PA has received an abundance of rain. Sunny days have been few and far between and I still feel the contrast with sunny, dry Sedona. I am trying to step into this change with arms open to receive. I recently came across a writing that reinforces the idea that one cannot receive if the hands are already full. So, I have been trying to imagine my hands empty and welcoming of the rains, even thinking that they are washing through my body as well with their energy. I am feeling the rewards, as I see, almost as if overnight, daffodils, hyacinth,and blossoming trees. The grass is suddenly lush and birds of all variety are singing their reacquaintance with each other and their nesting songs. On my morning walk today with Maggie, my greyhound, we were both distracted by flocks of seagulls swirling about the farmer’s field. Why are they so far from the ocean, I wonder. Adapting to habitat change? Then Canadian geese add their calls. They are abundant in this part of PA and I realize how much I had missed their community when I lived in Sedona. Today I feel blessed. I receive.